More than one way to believe

“If you’re silent you’re complicit”

When I was little I was brought up catholic. On Christmas we celebrated the Birth of Jesus .

The lights on the tree were not only pretty but, shining bright like the star that led the three wisemen to the manger to meet the baby Jesus.

Many traditional Christmas carols were learned and sung with pride.

Christmas wasn’t just about faith. Christmas was about Family.

We had the family favorite hamloaf and ambrosia. Logs glowed in the fireplace as the couches were filled.

Sometimes it was the untraditional that was memorable. I’ll never forget having Spaghetti as part of Christmas Dinner when visiting my Great Aunt & Uncle and Family.

In School we sang songs about Frosty the Snowman, Santa Claus and Hanukkah. In art we learned about Kwanza and made art in celebration.

I had neighbors who celebrated Both Christmas and Hanukkah.

I’ve always had curiosity about the other religions that are celebrated.

One of the great things about the country we live in is the Freedom we have to celebrate religion.

It’s not up to us to judge whether someone’s religious are right or wrong.

The candles that glow on the menorah bring happiness and awe similar to the lights on the tree.

Songs that are sung on Hanukkah are a celebration of belief and nostalgia like the traditional Christmas songs sung.

Hanukkah, Christmas & Kwanza allow families to come together and celebrate belief.

These holidays allow people to come together to celebrate tradition or create new traditions.

Little eyes are full of wonder celebrating a holiday for the first time.

Religiously I don’t know what I believe.

I’m glad that I was taught that there is more than one way to believe!

World autism day 2022

Today is world autism day!

I can’t tell you what the experience of having Autism Spectrum is like for other autistic people. I can tell you what is like for me.

I mask. (Not just in pandemic terms. ) It’s not something that I realize that I am doing . There’s so much that go into social interaction and what I have learned through that by the time I have gotten done with social obligations I am exhausted!

I feel pain differently. When I was 8 years old I broke my foot in two places. I walked on it for two weeks before I got in to the doctor.

I put up with pain for too long . It’s to hard to recognize that it is there.I get to the point sometimes where I meltdown because the pain I have snowballs out of control.

Dating and Having a relationship isn’t something that is coming easy for me. It is discouraging and It gives me anxiety. It’s hard when your not at the same level of experience as your peers.

I’ve had some cool life experiences. (Advocating in Washington DC) I know that my ideas and my creativity are just few ways that I show my capability.

“You draw what you see” is what I was told by one of my art teachers/mentors. My brain allows me to find the different lines and shapes needed to sketch. I’m good at finding the detail a picture has.

I’m nurturing and good with animals. When it comes to animals I feel like I have a gift. Dogs and Cats like and trust me.

These examples are just a few of the ways in which I experience autism first hand.

This Autism acceptance month listen to my voice and listen to the voice of my fellow Autistic self advocates.

The [Disability ] Skin You’re in!

She’s a beautiful person! A Victoria’s Secret model from Puerto Rico. Her name is Sofia . I wonder how many of the men & women who have seen her photo would feel that she is beautiful from the chest up or when wearing a sweater. Without the alluring appeal of the bra would they still notice Sofia? Would her Disability matter more ?

The sad truth is that YES, it would matter.
Her ideas, Her goals , Her accomplishments are all important.
Disability and Capability are still going to be judged.

Metaphorically speaking a person should be accepted and found appealing in whatever skin they’re in.
A Disability should not matter more or less.

Love for the WIN!

Part of a mixed media collage art piece that I made which features different goals and motivating quotes that I have.

I know that there are many things right now that hold a lot of importance and require resolution.

Disabled People STILL are NOT able to get married and keep their Healthcare and Social Security Benefits.

SSI and SSDI are tools that help Disabled people who are unable to work or that can not work full time.

We have seen in the past few years How VITAL Having Healthcare is especially to Disabled people who may have preexisting conditions and underlying comorbidities .

Yes, Human rights, Foreign affairs , and Supply shortages are defiantly some big issues!

Why can’t we have a WIN?

Disability DOES NOT mean an inability to LOVE!

With Disability there is Capability!

Let Love WIN!

Let Disabled People Marry without losing their benefits and healthcare!!

Marriage Equality a Fairy Tale

As a child I loved watching Disney Movies. The elegance of Belle’s ball gown , The Castle with all of it’s characters , The Belle and The Beast grew fond of each other, and The race for love before the last rose petal fell.
Stories like “Beauty and The Beast “ were enchanting.
I know now that I’ve gotten older that there’s a difference between fairy tales and reality. As an adult there parts of my story that are more like The Beast.

I’m on the Autism Spectrum. I have struggles that I have faced. Sometimes it feels like I’m waiting anxiously for that last petal to fall. Time is fleeting.

I have strengths which help me to accomplish my goals.
Self advocacy is something that I have done quite a bit of. It’s important for disability advocates or disabled self advocates to share their story.
I started blogging about Various Disability and Life topics in 2017.

“Law Syndrome” isn’t something that a lot of people are familiar with. “Law Syndrome “ Prevents Disabled people from being able to have a career, get married or live a productive life. Disabled People lose their benefits from Social Security : Supplemental Social Security Income (SSI) or Social Security Disability Income (SSDI ) and Healthcare.

The Beast lives in solitude in the castle under a spell. While not animated this is the story for Disabled people. The cost of living is expensive SSI and SSDI have not seen a raise. Everyone should have access to affordable health care.

I’m a hopeless romantic who wants enchantment!
Until laws change my enchantment is a fairy tale. Not reality.

Disabled people fall in love.

Disabled people work.

Disabled people get sick.

We are human beings!

Alone my voice is a pebble making ripples in the ocean. Together our voices can make waves in the ocean.
Let’s break the spell that is upon us and Bring forth enchantment.

Tell me you have autism without telling me you have autism..

1 in 54 children will be diagnosed in with Autism Spectrum disorder.

I am 1 in 144 females that is diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder.

First grade

I don’t remember the appointment where I was diagnosed. When I met with the Doctor I made eye contact and I smiled. Because of those social skills that I used I was diagnosed with Aspergers which is now considered Autism Spectrum Disorder.

As a child I was very shy. My classmates answered questions for me. My teachers thought that my Parents were doing my homework for me!

I could express myself and I was smart.

In fact I’ve always been a little gifted with hyperlexia ( the ability to read at levels far beyond those expected for their age)

I’ve always been very nurturing whether it was a pet or a baby I’ve loved providing care.

I don’t think that this is something that people realize can be a strength. There is still the misconception that autistic people can’t be independent or care for others.

My Clay mask

I’m a creative person

Writing, Photography, Sketching are some of the ways that I create.

The clay mask that I made is a good depiction of what Autism Spectrum can be like for females.

As a child while I was shy and my classmates spoke for me at school , at home I talked, I giggled. I was a different person.

Autism spectrum behaviors in females are different than males. That makes it harder to diagnose.

These are only a few signs of autism spectrum in females.

Physical pain is something that I feel differently

When I was in 3rd grade I broke my foot in two places I walked on it for over a week. When I am in pain I put up with it for too long. (It’s not interfering with my ability to live life) It gets to the point where the pain builds and becomes too much. I get frustrated and sad.

I trust science and medicine

I’m happy that I have received both doses of the covid 19 vaccine

In 2020 I got my TDAP vaccination. I’m happy to do my part by getting vaccinated so that I can protect those who cannot.

Vaccines DO NOT cause autism!

In 2010 I had whooping Cough. I know how important vaccines are and how they can make a difference.

Herd Immunity +Vaccinations = I grew up

I feel that it is important to share about who I am. There is a lot of diversity among Autistic people.

I’m not the same.

Though each experience and person is different. My experience and what I write about can help other people.

Integrity to a role

This is a photo from a film by a music artist that was nominated for two golden globe awards.

The “actress “ played the role of an autistic person.

Why is this wrong?

She Does Not have autism!

Disabled Actor’s and Actresses’ should play the parts of Disabled Characters!

Thanks to the way this actress inaccurately portrayed a disability Stigma and harmful misconceptions now are what people see when they look at autistic people.

It’s hard enough for autistic people to have jobs or work, have friendships or relationships , or Be social without these barriers.

It doesn’t accurately show who we are or what we experience.

Sensory sensitivity is not something that is fun. It’s not something that makes us look unintelligent as the picture from the moving portrays. For me it’s a time where I want to get out of that situation. I have to listen to music or take a walk.

I’m a self advocate & advocate

I’m Creative

I participate in Special Olympics and have fitness goals

I’m good at training dogs

I’ve written all of these blog posts

When I was younger I was very shy. I had classmates who talked for me. I had teachers who thought my parents were doing my homework for me!

At home I was a different person I talked a lot.

I found my voice

I still am finding out who I am as venture further into life. I like who I am and who I am discovering.

Autism does not look like this film or this actresses’ portrayal of it.

Autistic characters need to be played Autistic Actors.

I want to see someone that brings integrity to a role because they’re autistic.

We can’t have acceptance or understanding of autistic people if people continue to “speak “for us

Listen

We are capable

STOP the “MUSIC”

There is a new video out with inaccurate and dramatized portrayal of autism spectrum.

Music

This has a lot of autistic people very irate and fearful.

1. An actress plays the part of the “young autistic woman”

There are autistic people who self advocate and who have a passion for acting that would of been a great fit for this role!

You Can’t simulate an autistic person’s experience for a movie or a tv show with someone who is NOT autistic !

A Disabled Character in a movie or a TV show should be played by an actor / actress that has that Disability!!

2. Stigma Continues

Autistic people still heavily feel the stigma that developed from the FALSE report that autism was caused by vaccines.

An autism diagnosis became something that was feared.

Autism isn’t always easy!

Meltdowns ,

Stimming / Regulating ,

Sensitivities ,

And Anxiety , Depression or Trauma are just some of the things Autistic People experience.

An inaccurate portrayal of the experiences that Autistic people have is harmful!

3. Not every Autistic person has the same experience

My life. What I have gone through. The skills that I have learned and use. My strengths and weaknesses . The relationships I have. There many different things that contribute to my authentic autistic self.

4. Helping Autistic people, Breaking stigma.

For situations like meltdowns that Autistic People have there are right and there are wrong ways to help an autistic person who is already in a fragile state. Saying or doing the wrong thing can escalate an already tense situation.

Meltdowns and stimming are moments that are sometimes very public. They cause to pause and stare. Peers may bully because what they see and don’t understand is something that looks funny or entertaining.

The dramatized and inaccurate portrayal of these moments that an Autistic person has creates stigma and providing the wrong type of help for a meltdown is like pulling an object from a person that has been impaled. It HURTS them!

These are just a few reasons why OUR experiences and OUR voices matter!

Nothing About us Without us!!

Day Three

Day Three of this writing challenge asks : What are three pet peeves that you have?

1. Humming and Whistling Noises like humming and whistling are like an assault on my hearing. I wish sometimes that I could poke something in my ear to stop that undesired sound that fills them.

2. When socks get a hole in the toe I don’t like when socks get a hole in the toe area of them. Especially if someone else has worn them before you. I don’t like that feeling of the toe sticking out from the sock.

3. People who don’t clean up after their dog I’ve seen a lot of poop piles that people haven’t taken the two seconds it takes to clean up. The poop that dogs leave behind are the way disease is spread, also that’s not something that I want on my shoe.🤢

The toll it takes

The Pandemic’s affect on the Disability Community

This Pandemic has been hard on everyone. Changes to Graduation ceremonies, Birthday Party’s , Holiday’s , Sporting events and more.

Life has changed so that Life can go on.

While these social changes are necessary, that doesn’t make it any easier.

Up until the middle of last March when many of these changes began I was doing Special Olympics , Some Art Classes and volunteering. Last year we came together for holiday parties.

For many of us it is a lot quieter this year than it was last year. We don’t have the holiday parties . Holiday shopping comes right to the doorstep.

A lot has changed in a short amount of time!

These small changes have a BIG impact on the Disability community. The aforementioned NBC News story shares the impact the changes the pandemic has created and the impact it has had on their Disabled son/Brother.

I have been able to use blogging, Creating art, Running ,Biking , and Walking my dogs, to get outside and to exercise my brain.

Not everyone is able to do this.

Even so, The pandemic and the changes that it has brought to routine are hard.

Anger

Isolation

Fear

Depression

Anxiety

Stress

Are some of the feelings that people have dealt with during this pandemic.

The changes which are unsettling as it is aren’t easy for disabled people. It’s lonely not having the social interactions that we had before. It’s not easy for everyone to adjust to technology based social interaction like zoom.

There are Disabled people who are essential workers that are putting their lives on the line to make necessary money to pay for housing, food, and medication. In contrast there are Disabled people who are either unemployed or that have been laid off and due to the pandemic can not work.

The next round of stimulus checks passed by congress , bringing aid to people affected by this pandemic Did Not include help for the Disability Community.

A lot changed in a short amount of time going into this pandemic. A vaccine , maybe more than one vaccine is the hope that we have for change.

A lot can change!

You’re not alone in how you feel! You’re not alone in your struggle!